Hello dear friend,
How are you doing today? I hope you are well. Keep on moving in your mission, whatever it is, and things will become clearer while you walk.
I am rooting for you.
I am glad to be starting the year a bit slower than usual. By the sheer mercy of God, I have been less busy than usual, and I have used the time to discipline myself in my spiritual and personal pursuits, teasing out kinks and becoming clearer in my thoughts on which direction I am going.
We often enter a new year focused on clearing physical clutter—donating old clothes, organizing shelves, and deleting files. I can evidence this with the many big bags in my hallway, waiting for the charity shop run.
My friend, I have come to learn that some of the heaviest clutter we carry isn’t visible. It lives quietly in the mind and body, shaping how we respond, rest, and relate. Did you hear that? The clutter in your mind shapes what you hear when people are speaking to you, how you respond, and this creates a trajectory you may not be able to reverse.
Emotional clutter is made up of unprocessed feelings, outdated beliefs, unresolved hurts, and expectations that no longer serve who we are becoming.
By the third week of January, many of us begin to notice something quietly unsettling: we didn’t just carry calendars, plans, and responsibilities into the new year—we carried emotions too. The unfinished conversations. The disappointments we never named. The pressure to “do better” this time.
Emotional clutter doesn’t announce itself loudly; it shows up as heaviness, fatigue, irritability, or a constant sense of being overwhelmed for reasons we can’t quite explain. The frown that is your “resting face”.
At the beginning of last year, I invested in an overpriced but really good diary that gave prompts and broke down goals into daily acts of commitment. I loved it, and I was really excited to fill it in daily… Until I realized I couldn’t take it everywhere, and I didn’t make time for it in my daily schedule.
It ended up being left behind as my days went on. I couldn’t keep up with it. One thing that taught me is that, whenever I want to put in a new object or task in my life, I need to look at the existing tasks and find a dedicated space for it.
A sacrifice is required. There is an opportunity cost for everything new we take on. New friend, new partner, new child, new business, new project, or new habit.
Sacrifice. opportunity cost.
While we often focus on clearing physical spaces, emotional clutter can be far more draining. It lives in the background, shaping our reactions, affecting our rest, and influencing how present we feel in our own lives.
As the year unfolds, this is a gentle invitation to pause and decide what no longer needs to come with you.
Consider the Old Narratives About Yourself
Many of us carry stories about who we are that were formed in survival seasons: I must always be strong. I can’t fail. I don’t deserve ease. These narratives may have helped you cope once, but they can quietly limit growth now. Your mum always called you lazy, and so now you are driven and are about to drive yourself into the ground, based on an expired proclamation. Kill it. Now.
Leaving them behind doesn’t mean denying your past. It means recognizing that you are no longer the person you had to be to survive it. You are allowed to evolve beyond the version of yourself shaped by pressure or pain.
Unprocessed Disappointments
Disappointments that were never acknowledged don’t disappear—they settle into the body as tension, cynicism, or emotional numbness. Maybe things didn’t unfold as planned. Maybe people let you down. Maybe you let yourself down.
1Samuel 30:6 – David strengthened himself in the Lord. You can do the same, because there is a level of encouragement that only God can give. It enters you and builds you up, gives you a holy rebellion against anything that has previously cut you down.
Instead of carrying those disappointing moments forward, allow yourself to name them honestly. Grief is not weakness; it is a form of emotional housekeeping. What you make space for now will shape how lightly you move through the coming year. Fly lighter, my friend.
Guilt for Resting and Saying No
One of the most common forms of emotional clutter is guilt—especially around rest, boundaries, and choosing yourself. Guilt convinces us that worth must be earned through constant output and availability.
But rest is not something to apologize for. Boundaries are not selfish. Leaving behind the guilt associated with caring for your nervous system is a powerful act of self-respect, personal responsibility, and maturity.
Comparisons That Drain Your Energy
Comparison quietly erodes contentment. It turns other people’s lives into measuring sticks for your own life and beating rods for your back. Social media, professional milestones, and even well-meaning conversations can feed this habit.
What if you left behind the need to keep up? Your path does not need external validation to be valid. Progress looks different when it is aligned with your values rather than someone else’s pace.
A new car every ten years is as valid as a new car every year, only if it is in alignment with the season and the will of God. Stay focused and look at your own map.
Unspoken Resentments
Resentment often comes from repeatedly abandoning yourself—saying yes when you meant no, staying silent when something hurt, giving beyond your capacity. Over time, these unspoken feelings become emotional clutter that clouds relationships and inner peace.
Releasing resentment doesn’t always require confrontation. Sometimes it begins with clarity, boundaries, and compassion—for yourself first.
The Pressure to Start Over Perfectly
There is a subtle pressure at the beginning of a new year or even the beginning of anything we engage in, to reset completely, to become instantly better, calmer, more disciplined. This pressure creates emotional clutter by framing growth as performance rather than process.
I remember starting my higher training about three years ago and wondering how best to maximize this opportunity to develop my expertise. I sat down with a piece of paper and made the most ridiculous schematic, which I now call a spider diagram, of everything I was interested in and what was available locally to support these interests.
It wasn’t pretty. It was effective, a start of great things to come, a first step of many. This is the idea, taking that first step will not be the best, but it will be a start.
You don’t need a dramatic transformation to move forward. Growth that lasts is often quiet, uneven, and deeply human.
Creating Space for the Year Ahead
Letting go of emotional clutter isn’t about erasing the past. It’s about choosing what no longer needs to travel with you. When emotional weight is released, clarity emerges. Energy becomes more available. Decisions feel less forced.
As you step into this year, consider asking yourself gently:
- What am I holding out of habit rather than truth?
- What emotions deserve acknowledgement instead of suppression?
- What would it feel like to move forward lighter?
Emotional clarity is not found in doing more—it is found in carrying less. And sometimes, the most meaningful way to begin a new year is by choosing what to leave behind.
You can Support My Work
You don’t need to arrive in this year fully healed or perfectly organized. You only need to arrive honest—willing to carry less, breathe deeper, and move forward lighter than before.
Not everything you carried last year belongs in this one. This is another opportunity to tell yourself, “You are better than yesterday, set for today, and prepared for tomorrow.” You are worthy of a different, more wholesome way of living now. We can do this together. We are God’s investment, he bought us with a price, and God… He is a wise investor.
Until next time — stay warm, stay growing, stay loving, stay whole.
With love and light,
Amaka.
